Published December 1, 2025
The holidays are here, which can be a time of great happiness, but can also be a time when mental health issues like depression and anxiety can spike for many people—including children. Your child might seem more withdrawn, have less energy, have difficulties with their routine tasks, or have been worrying more, which are all signs that they might be struggling with their mental health.
Talking with your child about their mental health can feel daunting, though, since there are a lot of stigmas and fears that can make the topic feel almost impossible to bring up. But don’t worry—as much as it might feel otherwise, talking about mental health and the thoughts and feelings that go with it can actually help reduce those stigmas and fears. To help you start the conversation with your child, we’ve pulled together some tips in this next article in our series, “How to Talk to Kids About Difficult Subjects.”
Have Frequent Check-Ins
Even though it feels like a big topic to deal with, talking to your child about their mental health can start as short check-ins. Asking your child to share about how they felt about their day and making it a routine can help your child become more comfortable sharing the highs and the lows. This then makes it easier for you to ask them about what might be going on if something feels off and may also make it easier for your child to open up to you about it.
For some great resources to help start your check-ins, check out NAMI’s (the National Alliance for Mental Illness) free resources: the 10 Question Tuesday List activity guide and the Meet Little Monster coloring book.
Pick a Good Time and Space for Your Conversation
When you’re creating your check-in routines with your child, pick a time when there are fewer distractions, like during mealtimes, at bedtime, or when you both are in the car. Turn your phone off so that your attention is fully on your child. Make sure that you both are both feeling calm and comfortable—you want to make sure your child feels safe during the conversation. As you begin your check-in or start a larger conversation about mental health, watch your child’s reactions. If they start to shut down, that’s okay! Let them know that you’re there to listen and that you care about them, then ask when a better time would be to talk and try again then.
Ask Open-Ended Questions and Listen
As parents, it might feel like you have to have a whole speech prepared about mental health, when actually, one of the best ways for you to have the conversation with your child is to let them take the lead. Start with open-ended questions like, “What are you thinking about today?” and follow them up with prompts like, “Tell me more about that.” Keep your body language open to show that you’re interested in what your child has to say and try using reflective listening, where you focus on what they’re sharing and then say back what you heard. An example of this would be saying, “It sounds like you’re feeling stressed about your upcoming quiz.” Thank your child for sharing their emotions with you, even if they may be difficult for you to hear. The goal is to create a space where your child can share freely and not feel judged. This will help them view you as someone who can help them when things feel difficult, rather than someone they should fear or hide their feelings from.
For more helpful open-ended questions you can ask your child, check out these conversation starters from The Kids Mental Health Foundation and this list from SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration).
Share Your Own Experiences
A great way to connect with your child about mental health and show them that expressing their emotions is okay is by sharing your own feelings with them. Just as you’re asking them to tell you about their day, share about your day and name the emotions you felt. This teaches your child that having feelings—no matter how big or small—is normal. You can also help your child by sharing any healthy, effective coping strategies you personally use so that they have some tools in their toolbelt when they have a difficult day. Even just modeling these coping behaviors in front of your child is helpful, since they learn by watching you.
If your child asks you about your own personal mental health struggles, share your experiences, but also remind them that everyone’s mental health journey looks different—what you’ve experienced may not be exactly what they will experience. This is another great moment to share any coping strategies with mental health difficulties that have worked well for you.
Problem Solve With Them
Finding solutions when struggling with mental health can be challenging, but the great thing is that neither you or your child has to figure out how to do it alone. If your child is having a difficult time with their mental health, you can empower them by asking for some of their ideas on how to move forward. You can also tell them that you have some ideas, but ask when they’d like to hear your thoughts before sharing, just to make sure your child is receptive at that moment. This is a great opportunity to offer your child the chance to talk with a therapist, counselor, or another mental health professional, since they will be able to give your child more specific input and guidance based on what they’re struggling with.
Problem solving can also look like doing more family activities when things get difficult for your child. Games, movie nights, or other activities out in your community can help your child feel less alone.
Get Support From Others
Remember that you don’t have to be the only person trying to help your child figure this out. Talking with other people in your community— family, trusted friends, teachers, coaches, school counselors, etc.—can help you get their perspectives on how seriously your child might be struggling. Just remember to respect your child’s privacy and trust as much as you can during these conversations. You can also reach out to your child’s pediatrician and get their thoughts—they can even give you in-network referrals to mental health professionals.
Take Immediate Action If Your Child Is in Crisis
Sometimes, having a conversation may not be enough. If you feel that your child is at risk of harming themself or others, call 911 or 988 for Indiana’s Suicide & Crisis Line or go to an emergency room. Do not leave your child alone until the crisis has passed.
If your child is not at risk to harm themself or others, NAMI recommends taking the following steps to help them navigate through a mental health crisis:
- Reassure them that you are here to support them.
- Contact their therapist or mental health professional, if they have one, to get their advice on what to do.
- Connect with a hotline via phone or text (like Indiana’s Suicide & Crisis Line) to get advice.
- Ask their primary care doctor for a mental health assessment.
- Make a plan on what you’ll do if your child’s mental health escalates into an emergency.
Remember that everyone’s mental health journey is unique and can take time—you probably won’t be able to solve it with one conversation, and that’s okay. Continue to show up for your child and be willing to listen to them when they share with you and you’ll show them that you’re a trusted source of support when the going gets tough. Also know that you don’t have to tackle these conversations by yourself. For additional, trusted resources on mental health, check out NAMI’s website, which has links to immediate chat or phone support, as well as articles to help you support your child’s mental health.
Tags: kids mental health